


if you took to me (like a gull takes to the wind)

by henwens



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Lawyers, Alternate Universe - Restaurant, M/M, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-04
Updated: 2019-12-08
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:54:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21599503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/henwens/pseuds/henwens
Summary: Yamaguchi Tadashi wants to impress his managers by crafting beautiful cakes, but instead he spends his time delivering them to the nearby hospital. He must be doing something wrong.He's clearly doing something wrong if a personal injury lawyer decides on a whim to give him his card.But he's not about to invite that bad karma into his life, even if the lawyer in question has piercing, golden eyes and an impossible smile.
Relationships: Tsukishima Kei/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Comments: 18
Kudos: 199





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> the journey to this fic was a long one... i wanted it to be a departure from my big windup fic also set in a bakery, so there is a major location shift which led to other changes as well. this is also super inspired by the shins' 'new slang,' specifically the cover by kina grannis. this might be overall a little unusual, but i hope that you enjoy ♡

Tadashi checked his watch and picked up the pace of his steps by a half beat, throwing out a silent curse at his commute. If Hinata beat him here again—

 _Ah, no contest_ , Tadashi groaned as he saw the iron door of Karasuno’s back entrance swing open, and a red-headed figure slink inside. So, Hinata would call cakes with Asahi again, and Tadashi would fall aside to the utilitarian roles of the night shift in one of the most famous restaurants in Sendai.

Still, Tadashi shouldn’t complain—

“I get to decorate the cakes with you tonight, Asahi-san, right?” Hinata was saying, bouncing excitedly on the balls of his feet as a tall man, hair neatly pulled up in a bun and hairnet, scratched at his cheek awkwardly, leaving a dusting of flour to catch in his shadow.

“Looks like it, Hinata,” Asahi said in return. “Grab the orders from Yuu, if you don’t mind. He and Tanaka will be heading out soon. Oh, Yamaguchi, would you mind helping Ennoshita tonight?”

 _Again_ , Tadashi thought internally, sending a cautious smile towards the gentle giant and glancing around for Ennoshita. After all, Asahi wasn’t kitchen manager, and was just passing along the orders of…

Sawamura Daichi and Sugawara Koushi. Floor manager and kitchen manager, though so inseparable it had taken Tadashi a while to figure out who was which. Tadashi felt a shiver of anticipation snake down the back of his neck as the kitchen manager of Karasuno turned his attention his way.

“Yamaguchi,” Suga said with a warm smile. “Ennoshita is clearing the front with Tanaka and Nishinoya, so you’re getting started back here on your own. Don’t worry, I’ll catch you up.”

"Hi, Yamaguchi!" Tadashi nearly swayed back as Hinata ran past him through the wide double doors linking the large kitchen to the even larger front-of-house, the doors swinging wildly in his wake. As they opened and closed, Tadashi caught glimpses of Hinata speaking with Nishinoya Yuu, who worked front of house, and Ennoshita Chikara, a floater who essentially handled… well, everything. But mostly, staff relations, and… Tadashi. He didn’t mind taking orders from Ennoshita, he only wished that the other man didn’t take the routine of the job as a challenge to be met nightly. There was never any variation or deviance, simply an order to follow. Tadashi linked eyes with Suga again, the man pulling a smile that highlighted his beauty mark, high in the corner of his eye. He was sure that Suga was a mind reader, and before he could think anything that would get him fired, he bowed slightly toward his manager to show that he was listening.

“Right,” Suga said, patting Daichi on the arm as the other man took off through the doors, shouting Tanaka’s name. “We’ll need the dough for the hand pies cut for second proofing by 3:00 AM, so walk your start back from there. Also, we need another prep of fillings, they sold well today. Then, check with Asahi—” Tadashi perked up—“to see what colors he needs refilled for icing. Ennoshita should be back by then and can fill you in on the rest.”

Tadashi bent at the waist again to show he understood, and Suga’s smile really did feel warm in that moment, his appreciation a sudden and sure thing. But then, the doors closed behind him and Tadashi was turning to the cool stainless steel of the appliances that surrounded him on every side, reaching in cabinets for a bowl to start sifting flour into.

“Whoa!” Hinata’s voice reverberated in the quiet of the kitchen on night shift. “Suga said we can do a theme? Can I start on the isomalt?”

 _Yeah_ , Tadashi thought, pouring a hefty amount of flour into the hand crank. _Nothing to complain about_.

⋆｡°✩

“Deliveries?”

He hears Tanaka Ryuunosuke before he sees him, as is usually the case. Tadashi has just stepped through the door.

“Yes, Tanaka,” Daichi says with a firm grit to his teeth. Tadashi can’t help but smile at the scene unfolding.

Tanaka, Karasuno’s bartender with a penchant for flashy tricks, had been on Daichi’s bad side recently after preparing a backdraft for a customer who overzealously tried to put out the flame that danced across the surface of the drink before Tanaka could do it himself. Nishinoya, who had been watching the scene with excitement and who had eventually flung his serving towel over the flames that trickled across the bartop when the customer panicked, _vehemently_ supported Tanaka that a customer should never ask for something when they don’t know what they should expect. Daichi’s response had, of course, been “the customer always knows best” (which was met with an eyeroll from Noya and, surprisingly, Kiyoko Shimizu, Karasuno’s hostess).

“Deliveries,” Daichi was plowing forward as though Tanaka were a simple annoyance in his rearview mirror, “to the local hospital. Special desserts to cheer up the patients there. We need someone to make a few rounds once a day to drop them off.”

“I’ll do it,” Tadashi says, and several sets of eyes turn to him, and _oops_ , he had never intended to create the impression that he didn’t want to work here, even if he was sometimes unsatisfied with the nature of that work. If he could help his coworkers out—“Please,” he added, “let me assist you in this way.”

Daichi was nodding already. “Okay. The deliveries will take place in the morning, on your way out. The hospital has explained that the patients’ families are placing these orders so that patients have something to enjoy before visiting hours start, or during business hours when family might not be able to take time off.”

“It’s nice,” Tadashi found himself saying. It could be a nice way to start his day. It could have… meaning.

He was surprised when Daichi, not exactly stone-faced but definitely not as warm and open as Suga, shared a quick smile with him. “That’s what we’re hoping for,” he said. “You can start today.”

Tadashi’s shift flew by pretty quickly after that, even with Hinata overzealously filling a pastry bag to the point where it overflowed and dripped on Tadashi’s sneakers as he passed by. The pink frosting would leave a stain, but Tadashi had bought a pair of shoes specifically for work for this reason.

Besides, the pink stain is already fading in the precious light of morning by the time he rounds the corner near Karasuno and takes off in the direction of the hospital, three pastry boxes cradled carefully in his arms.

The nurse working the front desk is overjoyed to see him step through the sliding glass doors, saying that she and her fiancé love going to the restaurant on their anniversaries. Tadashi flushes, not used to being on this side of Karasuno—a face for people to compliment—and asks which rooms he needs to be directed to.

Dawn was breaking over Sendai and the rush of traffic had been noticeable on his walk in, but inside the hospital there were new sounds to overtake his senses. Pages overhead and the rattle of carts in the halls, and the low distinct voices of doctors, nurses, and their patients, attempting to keep their conversations clandestine. He found room 506 after a series of elevator rides, rapped politely on the door, and left the first box and the little card that went with it on the sleeping patient’s bedside table.

Room 318 brought him down a set of stairs, and to a room that was already occupied, not only by the patient, but by a pair of men in dark suits. One of them, a man with dark bangs cut severely across his forehead, caught his eye through the glass window, and shook his head imperceptibly. Tadashi took the hint and went searching for 229 instead.

Upon his return to 318, he caught the men leaving, the door held open wide by the dark-haired one as the other, tall, blond, and bespectacled, finished his conversation with the patient.

“Our card is on the bedside. We will have to finish our meeting when you are feeling more up to it, but please don’t hesitate to reach out when you need it.”

He bowed towards the man in bed before walking out with his dark-haired companion. Before the door could shut fully, Tadashi snuck a foot in and held it open with his elbow, hands still occupied with the last delivery. Suddenly, the pressure of the door was released, and Tadashi turned to see that the blond man had caught the door for him, was holding it open with a long arm outstretched. He was taller than Tadashi by a couple of inches, and so Tadashi had to look up at him to meet his eyes, golden and piercing even through the glasses. The smile that caught at the corners of his mouth was not like Suga’s, or Daichi’s, or any that Tadashi had ever experienced before. It caught him entirely off guard.

“Th-Thank you,” he said, turning his attention to the patient who was watching eagerly, arms outstretched to take the treat someone had gifted him.

From behind, Tadashi heard the _click_ of the door shutting tightly, and he knew that the blond man and his companion were gone.

“Don’t mind the lawyers,” the man in bed says, his eyes bright and a little watery as he takes in the delicately frosted miracle in the box. Asahi’s work, Tadashi thinks. _And Hinata’s_. “Thank you for this.”

“I’m glad to bring it to you,” Tadashi said, turning to leave. He was surprised to find that he meant it.

⋆｡°✩

He was also surprised that when he left the man’s room, and turned a corner, he was still in the presence of the men in suits. The blond man was alone this time, his dark-haired partner in the room that he guarded, leaning against the door frame with a careful, coiled grace. Tadashi hurried past, trying not to stare, and made his way to the nurse’s station that was still well within view. As he checked out and confirmed his next delivery time, he realized that the men were on the move again. He’d have to pass them a third time if he wanted to leave the hospital.

 _Ridiculous,_ Tadashi thought to himself, both about the situation and his own anxiety. They were just lawyers, had no sway or say over his life or actions, but something in the man’s cool gaze that seemed to track him around the open waiting area of the hospital gave him… well, chills.

“Excuse me,” a voice to his right interjects through his thoughts, and Tadashi realizes he had been hesitating for too long and was, in fact, staring openly at the blond man. His suit is neatly pressed and dark against his pale skin, and the tug of his lips intones a certain _meanness_ that Tadashi isn’t used to.

“Wondering if this is all legal?” The man is asking him, and the quirk of his lip pulls ever higher.

“Oh, I—I wasn’t. Just heading out.”

“Tsk,” the man looked hesitant. Perhaps he thought Tadashi already had a negative impression of him. He wasn’t sure why it mattered. “Don’t worry, these are our clients. The extent of their injuries make it so that they can’t meet with us yet outside of a hospital bed.”

His eyes flicker to Tadashi’s shirt, emblazoned with Karasuno’s name on his right breast and Tadashi’s own embroidered just below. “Yamaguchi. You work delivery? Ever had an accident on the job? Auto accidents aren’t my specialty, but if it comes up, I can give you my card—”

“I’m not a delivery boy.” Tadashi was surprised by the ice in his own voice. He made to move away. The man stopped leaning against the wall, moved toward him.

“No offense meant. So you’re a baker then? Overnight? Accidents happen all the time in a workplace setting. Just take my card.”

The chills returned and cut their way through Tadashi’s arm as he took the card. Was this just inviting some bad karma into his life?

“You never know what might happen, so please give me a call when you need it. My number is first.”

Oh yes. Definitely not a nice smile.

Once he had turned a corner, he studied the card in the fluorescent glow of the overhead lights.

> Personal Injury Litigation Firm of Tsukishima and Kageyama   
> Serving Sendai and the Greater Miyagi Prefecture
> 
> Tsukishima Kei: 0X-XXXX-XXXX  
> Kageyama Tobio: 0XX-XXX-XXXX 
> 
> For Pedestrian Injuries, and Workplace Incidents

_How morbid, Tsukishimia Kei_ , Tadashi thought, as he deposited the card in the nearest bin.

⋆｡°✩

The man in Room 318 was named Ukai Ikkei. Apparently, his grandson worked long hours at a convenience shop, and had not been able to visit since his grandfather had the accident. So, he sent cakes in his stead.

And with the cakes, came Tadashi.

Ukai was a genial older man, who had been injured in a traffic accident, on the other side of a distracted driver. Ukai had shared with Tadashi the humor he found in the fact that he’d been involved in a traffic accident while indoors—the young driver, distracted by an incoming message—had drifted over a sidewalk and, in a panic, had accelerated straight into a shop. Ukai had been standing near the window and had pushed another customer out of the way when he saw the car coming, but even his quick reflexes weren’t enough for himself. There had been no fatalities, but Ukai’s legs had been injured to the point of double knee replacements—Ukai said the strain had always been there, from years of playing volleyball, and the accident had just accelerated everything.

On Tadashi’s third visit to the hospital, he started staying longer to actually speak with the patients he delivered to, even as the crisp hospital air and whir of overhead lights threatened to put him to sleep at the tail end of a long shift.

On Tadashi’s fourth visit, he asked Ukai what business he had with Tsukishima Kei. He had seen the other man around, passed by him in the halls, and had tried not to be too obvious in his interest—and even though it still made his skin prick to think of the other man’s golden gaze, he harbored a small amount of guilt for discarding his card so easily.

“If it weren’t for Keishin, I don’t know that I would have gotten involved,” he said, speaking of his grandson, the one who sent Tadashi with cakes and pastries every couple of days or so. Apparently, he was a friend of Daichi’s, and was getting a discount. “It’s hard to lay in a hospital bed and not feel like a burden.”

Tadashi bit his lip and felt the muscle shift. He knew a little something about feeling like a burden—his parents had paid for culinary school and had been so excited to hear about his appointment at Karasuno, and he had yet to repay them even with a dinner, embarrassed by his lowly station.

“But—why the lawsuit?”

“I feel that…” Ukai moved forward in his bed, and Tadashi lifted the empty box from his hands, placing the card from Keishin next to the others on his bedside table. “In life, accidents happen all the time. I don’t feel that anyone should be punished for a necessity, something that keeps balance. But when the accident throws so much into chaos—like the young woman, with the concussion, or the child who has had nightmares ever since, or even the old man who won’t be able to jump or even walk like he used to—then some balance needs to be restored. And it seems there are people in this world who think that money can restore that balance.”

Tadashi sat back a little in his chair, felt the strap of his bag shift, and moved to readjust it. “I guess that makes sense.”

“Like it?” Ukai smiled as Tadashi stood to leave. “Tsukishima helped me frame it that way. He’s sharp as a tack, that one. Did you know he used to play volleyball?”

Tadashi laughed at the brightness in the older man’s eyes. “Did he?” At Ukai’s curious gaze, he smiled wider. “So did I.”

⋆｡°✩

It wasn’t like Tadashi didn’t know what was happening. He knew exactly why he caught himself thinking of golden eyes and a cool smile in the quiet, spare moments of his day.

Tsukishima Kei was an outlier in his routine, waiting in the periphery but never close enough to touch, never something to be attained. Just like crafting cakes with Asahi, a prized baking job at Karasuno.

Tsukishima Kei was just another thing Tadashi wasn’t allowed to have.

So Tadashi buried himself in work, in proofing and rolling out dough, avoiding Hinata’s sporadic movements in a crowded kitchen, delivering cakes to Ukai and the other patients, and tinkering with recipes at home, in his own crappy apartment kitchen that was a cold shadow compared to the heat of Karasuno.

But when he found himself wondering what Tsukishima Kei was like beyond business cards and snappy suits, and when he found himself wondering what Tsukishima Kei was like on the court, like he was fifteen again and distracted by the blur of competition, he couldn’t bring himself to snap out of it.

If work wasn’t going to let him dream, then maybe he could have this.

One evening, Tadashi arrived at work and was met with Nishinoya’s excited crowing and Tanaka’s prying eyes, as Kiyoko calmly informed him that he’d had a visitor that day, a tall man in a suit with shorn, blond hair and glasses. A lawyer, hoping to see the place that delivered cakes to the hospital he visited for work. Hoping to see the person who delivered those cakes.

It was only then that Tadashi got his first taste of an attainable dream.


	2. Chapter 2

“So are you trying to threaten me, or am I supposed to be flattered?”

Tadashi was a little bit of a coward. He wasn’t about to stand up to his bosses, he wasn’t about to fight his way into a position that he actually wanted, and he wasn’t about to quit either.

But if there was one thing Tadashi could do—he could stand up to Tsukishima Kei, who had tried to find him.

He was a little bit of a coward, but he wasn’t an idiot. He knew what it was Tsukishima wanted, or, at least thought he did. He wanted it too.

“I—” Tsukishima Kei was standing tall, but so was Tadashi. He looked into the man’s eyes and willed his face not to flush red.

He had gone to the hospital the day after Tsukishima had gone to Karasuno to find him, not fully expecting the other man to be there. Sure enough, though, the moment he turned a corner after his last delivery, there was the pair of lawyers.

Tadashi had marched right over to Tsukishima and, without letting him get the first word, had jumped in.

Tsukishima wasn’t going to get out of this easily.

“You were looking for me yesterday, right? At Karasuno? I’m starting to think you’re actually going to ‘arrange’ something just to get my business.”

Tsukishima’s partner, the man Tadashi had always assumed was named Kageyama Tobio, burst out into laughter.

“Oh man, Tsukishima told me he was hoping to see you again, but I had no idea he’d go and be such an awkward bastard about the whole thing.”

Tadashi almost lost his nerve entirely when he saw the glare Tsukishima sent Kageyama’s way. It was hot enough to burn through steel. But when Tsukishima turned back to Tadashi, his gaze cooled. His face, though his expression had been startled at first, settled into his usual neutral state.

“Your name is Yamaguchi, right? I had wanted to try some of the cakes you’re always carrying around and just happened to mention your name to some of your coworkers.” A light dusting of pink cut across his sharp cheeks. “I didn’t realize they’d pass along my interest to you.”

"Ah." Tadashi leaned out of Tsukishima’s space, balancing on the heels of his feet. “And were you?”

Tsukishima raised a slender eyebrow. “Was I what?”

Tadashi could feel his heartbeat in his throat. “Were you interested?”

Kageyama snickered out another laugh and Tadashi spared only a glance at him, watched him turn and put some distance between himself and Tsukishima before the other man could retaliate, arms raised in a gesture of surrender.

When he looked back at Tsukishima, the smile that pulled at the man's lips was the same one he’d seen the first time he saw him, and it was something he was starting to get used to.

“Very,” Tsukishima said, and Tadashi’s will slipped, and his face lit up bright red. "How does coffee sound?"

⋆｡°✩

Tadashi used to spend his time thinking about how to make the perfect buttercream, and how to parboil the potatoes to prep them for the dinner rush the following day, and what spice he would experiment with that night in secret, as he tried to perfect the art of the savory pie.

He still thought about all of that, but now he also thought about Tsukishima.

They had gone for coffee, as Tsukishima had suggested, and two hours had slipped by before Tadashi started to feel the fatigue of the night. Tsukishima had been interested in Tadashi, had leaned his face casually into the palm of his hand and looked at Tadashi as he spoke, his golden eyes clear in the cool light of the coffee shop.

Tadashi had, embarrassingly, looked away from his sharp gaze more often than not. Even though he had been the one to make the first move, Tsukishima seemed to have gotten over his surprise quickly, leaving Tadashi floundering in the wake of his advances.

Not that Tsukishima had done much more than raise an eyebrow or laugh politely at one of Tadashi’s Hinata stories (he had many). And when they had parted from their date, Tsukishima had left Tadashi only with his number and the promise of a future date.

And now, Tadashi was standing over a double-boiler, tempering chocolate, and willing his thoughts to stray from what it might be like to have Tsukishima throw an arm over his shoulders, have him lean down an inch or two, and how the press of his lips—

 _Honestly_ , Tadashi shook himself out of the fog of his thoughts and checked the thermometer.

It had been bad enough to sit across from Tsukishima as he shared that he was a middle blocker for his school's volleyball team, had grown up in the same area as Tadashi. Tadashi’s first thought was that if his own team had been any better, they might have even played in competitions against each other. Tadashi’s second thought was what Tsukishima might be like beyond the suit, dressed down in sportswear that showed off the length of his arms, and the muscles needed to cut down a spike from mid-air.

Tadashi realized with a start that he was almost at the end of his shift and he had only a half-hour to work on his secret project.

In between the visits to the hospital, the hope of a new romance, and the shame of finding himself in such a limited role at one of the most well-respected restaurants in Sendai, Tadashi had remembered something about himself.

He really liked cooking.

He had always intended to specialize in patisserie, and had applied to Karasuno to fill that role, but as night shift had dragged into night shift and dreams of piping royal icing had been met with the reality of prepping royal icing, Tadashi had quickly found that the thought of all that sweet stuff turned his stomach in his off hours.

So instead of practicing sweet patisserie with his crappy apartment stove, he found himself cooking savory pies and pastries. The challenge thrilled him and, sometimes, he even prepared them secretly at Karasuno, after Ennoshita had left for home and while Hinata and Asahi were still preoccupied with the final details of their creation of the night.

When Tadashi pulled his squash, sage, and pancetta hand pies from the oven as dawn started to trickle into the kitchen of Karasuno, he was suddenly overcome with the urge to _share_ his creation with someone.

And while his first thought was Tsukishima, by the time his mind skipped to the next person on his list, he knew today was the day for action.

“What’s this?” Ukai said, for the usual orange pastry box of Karasuno was accompanied now by a plain white one.

Tadashi shifted uncomfortably in the chair laid out for guests, before handing Ukai a plastic fork. “It’s something I thought you might enjoy.”

Ukai turned his careful watch towards Tadashi. “And you made this?”

Ukai knew about Tadashi’s struggles to step out of the shadows of Karasuno. Though he had failed to tell his own parents about his plight, he felt safe telling the older man, as their relationship was sure to be fleeting, over as soon as Ukai left his hospital bed.

“I did,” Tadashi said. Ukai smiled around the bite he had taken.

“It’s good,” he said. “It’s even better that you’re taking ownership for this. See what happens when you push yourself?”

 _Yeah_ , Tadashi thought, smiling down at his phone as his text message alert chimed.

 _Tsukishima Kei_ , sang the notification.

“I see it now.”

⋆｡°✩

Of course, Tadashi should have known it was never meant to last.

Tsukishima set up their next date at a restaurant further downtown. Nekoma was not a true rival of Karasuno’s, as they frequently collaborated, but it garnered the same fanatical buzz from critics and customers alike. Tadashi had never seen the front of house at Nekoma, and he was excited to don some nicer clothing and play pretend with Tsukishima.

As soon as they had sat down, Tsukishima began asking Tadashi questions about the restaurant and food, as though asking for an expert’s opinion. Tadashi replied hesitantly at first, unsure in his ability to give an expert’s answer.

“It’s so interesting to think about all the preparation that goes into something that’s enjoyed for only minutes,” Tsukishima commented when they were halfway through dinner. Tadashi’s nerves went on high-alert, and he felt his shoulders tense. Although Tsukishima obviously knew he worked at Karasuno and was involved in the preparation and delivery of the food, he had yet to explain truthfully to Tsukishima what exactly his nightly duties were.

“I think it’s interesting to think about your job,” Tadashi said, trying to deflect. “What made you want to start helping people this way?”

Tsukishima’s grin was sly. “You make it sound too generous. Really, I was interested in applying my communication and research skills. The ‘helping others’ part came much later, after I’d been hired by my first firm. And I wasn’t even truly invested in that practice until Kageyama and I started our own practice.”

“It must have been difficult to do that.”

“It was. But we were never going to make partner at the place we got our start, and eventually we realized we’d have to undertake the risk of going off on our own if we were ever going to move up. It was a calculated risk, but ultimately there was no other choice. We were wasted where we were.”

Tadashi winced inwardly. They were approaching the subject he had so desperately tried to redirect them from.

“I believe people should go after what they want, no matter the cost. It’s something I’ve learned from this line of work, and watching people struggle to make the decision of getting what is owed to them or passing it up.”

Tsukishima suddenly leaned forward, and Tadashi’s heartbeat quickened. Tsukishima’s next words, though, made his blood run cold.

“Sometimes,” the other man said, golden eyes glinting dangerously in the crystal light of Nekoma. “Sometimes I think it’s such a cowardly decision, to not go after the thing that you deserve.”

Despite his fraying nerves, Tadashi met Tsukishima’s eyes.

“And do you think,” he asked, Tsukishima lifting a wine glass to his lips. “If Ukai hadn’t pursued the suit, and a settlement… would you think him a coward?”

Tsukishima seemed to weigh it for a moment, and in that moment Tadashi’s heart was weightless in his chest.

“I used to think,” Tsukishima says. “I used to think so many things just weren’t worth the struggle. I just didn’t see the point in working hard if it might end in a loss. But my perspective has changed, since. So, yes, I suppose. People who have no follow-through could be called cowards.”

“Well I think,” the words are heavy on his tongue, and he can hardly hear his voice over the shame ringing in his ears. “I think that’s pretty heartless.”

Tsukishima’s eyebrows fly up, a very pretty picture of shock. He opens his mouth to reply, but before Tadashi can even hear the response, he is moving. He stands from the table and throws his napkin on the half-eaten plate of food.

“I’m sorry,” Tadashi says. “I can’t do this.”

He thinks, later, that Tsukishima might have been calling out his name, but he is already out the doors before he can hear it.

⋆｡°✩

Tadashi had never before considered missing a day of work at Karasuno’s, even after that first week of disappointment, and the second, and every subsequent week after. But the next day, work is the furthest thing from his mind, to the point where he almost forgets to leave for his shift.

His commute is a haze, and when he turns the corner and sees Hinata’s red head bounce through the doors of Karasuno, he doesn’t even feel an ounce of bitterness. He just feels empty.

The door shuts heavily behind him, and Tadashi tries not to think of it as a final nail driven into a coffin. Suga’s smile is warm and welcoming, and Daichi’s look full of confidence, confidence in the reputation of Karasuno and the skill of his staff—confidence in Tadashi. And suddenly, he can’t take it anymore.

“Yamaguchi,” Ennoshita calls to him. “We’re starting with the potatoes tonight before moving on to—”

“No,” Tadashi says, and the word almost stops in his throat, so it comes out as a mouse-like squeak. For a moment, he thinks that no one heard him, and he is safe.

But then he takes in the look on Suga’s face, and Daichi’s, and Ennoshita’s, and everyone else who has congregated in the kitchen now that the front of house is closed. And he realizes that everyone, _everyone_ , has indeed heard him.

“What was that?” Daichi says, and his voice is so calm and unconcerned that it starts Tadashi’s heart again.

“I would like to help Asahi with the cakes, tonight,” Tadashi continues. “It’s something I’ve wanted to help with for a while, and though I know I have a lot to learn, I know that Asahi is a good teacher, and I won’t hold you back for long.”

Tadashi inhales shakily, and bows to his managers. “Please,” he says. “Allow me this opportunity.”

When he looks at them again, it is as though nothing has changed. Suga’s smile warm, Daichi’s expression comforting, and even Asahi behind them has a faint blush to his face as though he has never received a compliment in his life.

 _Shit_ , was the first thought that came flooding into Tadashi’s mind as he settled back into reality. _I can’t believe Tsukishima was right_.

He sees Suga open his mouth to respond at the same time he sees Hinata, rushing at him and shouting something like an apology, something like, “Yamaguchi, I’ve been so selfish, and I didn’t realize—”

And when Tadashi steps back to avoid the incoming blur, he realizes in a rush that behind him, a pot of potatoes has bubbled over, leaving a small puddle of water on the slick ceramic floor. The heel of Tadashi’s sneaker flings forward, his knee buckles, and his body goes down hard. Even across the ringing of his ears, Tadashi could hear the _pop_ and feel fiery pain bloom across his shoulder.

“Accidents happen all the time in a workplace setting.” A coy voice trickled into his consciousness.

 _I_ really _can’t believe Tsukishima was right_ , Tadashi thought, and then his vision blurred into darkness.

⋆｡°✩

Tadashi sat on the edge of his hospital bed trying to quell a wave of embarrassment. First standing up to his managers, thinking he had the right to just make any demand he wanted—and then a stupid slip and fall that dislocated his shoulder and landed him in the hospital, just like any other patient he'd ever delivered to.

He closed his eyes and willed the hot shame to leave his face, and then his chest, breathing out deeply before breathing in again, an old trick he had learned from his grandmother.

When he opened his eyes again, his eyes focused on the figure on the other side of the glass that lined his room.

Tsukishima.

The shock on his face was as plain as it had been when Tadashi left him in the restaurant yesterday. He saw Tsukishima’s eyes track down to the brace that cradled Tadashi’s shoulder, and then they scanned back up to his face, and locked with Tadashi’s own guilty stare.

Tsukishima opened his mouth as though he were about to speak, even though a thick pane of glass still separated them. But then, in a crushing motion, his gaze dropped and his mouth grew tight. It was a look of defeat that Tadashi never expected to see, not on Tsukishima. It looked so wrong.

Tsukishima turned away then, and Tadashi hurried to his feet. He had no idea what he wanted to say, but he knew apologies were in order, and he was willing to make them. The rush jostled Tadashi’s shoulder, though, and the blush of pain made Tadashi’s eyesight grow hazy. By the time he refocused his vision, Tsukishima was gone.

He sat back on the bed and felt the humiliation rush back. Eyes closed. Deep breath out. Shame from his face, from his chest. Deep breath in.

He heard the door to his room open and close.

He opened his eyes and adjusted them to the harsh lighting overhead.

Suga and Daichi stood before him.

“Yamaguchi,” Suga said, his voice blooming with comfort. “We need to talk.”


	3. Chapter 3

Daichi said, _You could have spoken to us about anything._

Suga said, _We never meant to make you feel invisible_.

And Tadashi realized that for all the time he had been hurting, he was now making his coworkers hurt, having never shared what was on his mind with them. He had always known the two of them felt Karasuno was a family, a lifeline connecting everyone who worked there, Kinoshita the cook and Yachi the server and Tadashi who worked every night, pouring himself into the small tasks, the unseen ones.

But now Daichi and Suga stood in front of him, and bowed their apologies to him, and Tadashi felt their watchful gaze. _We see you now_.

“Hinata said,” Suga continued, “that you make things towards the end of your shift. He showed us where you keep them, in the walk-in.”

Tadashi suddenly didn’t like being seen.

“They’re good,” Daichi said with a smile. “We haven’t really expanded to savory pastries at Karasuno yet, but it’s clear you worked hard to develop something that works.”

“If you have an attachment to nights,” Suga said. “You can start your own pastry line, alongside Asahi’s. Ennoshita can continue routine prep.”

“Or,” Daichi took over for Suga seamlessly. “You could work in the kitchens alongside the day shift, or a combination of both. But, we’d like to really make a go of this at Karasuno, because we think what you’ve done is really special. That is, if you’ll have us, especially after—”

He looked at Tadashi’s shoulder, and Tadashi startled. “Oh! No, no this was an accident, I understand it’s bound to happen sometimes.”

_Speak your mind._

“This all sounds great, but you’re not just doing this because—”

“I won’t say a small part of it isn’t due to our guilt,” Suga said. “But your talent plays a much larger role, Yamaguchi. You should be proud of what you’ve created, and we want to share that pride with Sendai. We’re a little selfish like that.”

Tadashi found himself nodding.

“We’ll let you think about it. But when you’re ready to come back,” Daichi was nearing the door. “We’ll be happy to see you.”

⋆｡°✩

Tadashi started his new position a week later.

Asahi, Karasuno’s head pastry chef, sent him a text that morning. _Good luck today!_

Tadashi smiled at it warmly, and when he checked his other messages, his finger hesitated over the name that had started it all. His last text, _I’m here!_ , blinked ominously below.

He had yet to send an apology, an explanation, or anything of the sort. Even though he knew it was necessary, whenever he tried to send something, he saw Tsukishima’s quiet look of defeat.

He just wasn’t ready to make the first move again. Not yet.

His commute felt a little different, now, and when he rounded the corner, there was no sign of Hinata. Tadashi was surprised to find that he missed that, even though he had unfairly begun to associate the sight of Hinata ahead of him with his own failure to advance at Karasuno. He would have to make it up to Hinata one day.

Now, when the heavy iron door swung behind him, he was met with an entirely new sight—the Karasuno day shift. Kinoshita and Narita, the day cooks, were busy in their own world, taking down the bowls of prepped vegetables that Tadashi had used to stow away at the end of his shift. Nishinoya and Tanaka were there, too, unpacking boxes near the walk-in. And to the side—

“Hinata?” 

Hinata lifted his head from his chest, and blinked his eyes wearily. When he recognized Tadashi, he sat up so quickly in the rickety plastic chair that Tadashi was afraid it might buckle under the sudden action.

“Yamaguchi!” Hinata cried. He shot forward and, this time, Tadashi took the hug head on. Lesson learned—there was no escaping the path of a shooting star.

“You didn’t have to stay so late past your shift,” Tadashi started, but Hinata shook his head.

“Of course I did! I had to wish you luck in person!” The warm glow of Hinata’s smile flickered briefly. “And I had to apologize in person, too. It’s my fault you got hurt, and then I showed Daichi and Suga your secret project, and I never, _never_ let you bake cakes with Asahi—”

Tadashi could see the tears welling in Hinata’s eyes, and he held up his hand to put a stop to it.

“None of that was your fault, Hinata,” he said. “In fact, you’re one of the people I owe the most to. I wanted to compete with _you_ , so I started to bake savory stuff. And if you _hadn’t_ shown Daichi and Suga what it was that I made, I don’t even know if I’d have a job here still!”

Hinata’s smile returned, and he stepped back to gather his things. “I appreciate hearing that, Yamaguchi. I know you will do great things here, and if you ever come back to the night shift, maybe we can make something together!”

“I’d like that, Hinata.”

Before Hinata left, he turned back. “Yamaguchi?”

“Hmm.”

“You said I was just one of the people who helped you. You should let the others know how you feel. It’s really nice to hear it!”

“Ah,” Tadashi said. He thought of Ukai, and the wise words given from his hospital bed. He thought of a business card in a trash bin, and golden eyes, and harsh words spoken over dinner.

As the iron door of Karasuno’s kitchen shut behind Hinata, Tadashi felt the warmth of the ovens kick up behind him.

But still, a sliver of his heart felt cold.

As he got settled into the work of the day, he knew he still had more to do.

⋆｡°✩

“Discharged?”

“He did so well in physical therapy, the trainers said it was like a miracle.” The nurse leaned conspiratorially over her station. “I think he was just too stubborn to let himself be held back anymore.”

Tadashi smiled. “That sounds like Ukai. It’s just, I have a gift for him. Do you know how I can get it to him?”

“Sorry, sweetie,” she shrugged. “I know you two were close, but I just can’t give out patient information. Think you can get a hold of someone who can?”

Tadashi’s brain spun. He knew Ukai’s grandson was a friend of Daichi’s, and would no doubt have his address. And then there was—

“Thank you,” Tadashi said, already taking out his phone. Before he could second guess his own stupid actions, he selected the dial button.

Three rings. Tadashi prayed Tsukishima would pick up. Prayed that he hadn’t already blocked his number, or could overlook the name flashing on the screen, prayed that he would give him a second chance.

A fourth ring. A fifth. Tadashi was about to give up on this impossible idea and just call Daichi instead, and then he heard the line pick up.

“What do you want?”

Well, Tsukishima definitely knew who was calling him. His voice was sharp but clear, even through the static of the phone.

“I—” A million thoughts flashed through Tadashi’s mind, a million things he could say, all of the apologies he felt he owed so many people. “I have a favor to ask.”

The silence on the other side was a crushing weight.

“It’s Ukai,” he started, “he’s left the hospital, and I wanted to get in touch with him, but I don’t have his information. Do you think you could give me his address?”

“That would go against all of our policies,” Tsukishima’s answer was immediate, and Tadashi held his breath. This was his chance, his answer was on the tip of his tongue, when—

“But if you are going to insist, then I could go with you.”

“Oh!” Tadashi’s heart swelled, and tears pricked his eyes. He had hoped, but he hadn’t really thought… “Y-Yeah, that would be—are you sure?”

“Mm.”

“Okay!”

“Okay.”

“Tsukishima,” Tadashi said, the name heavy on his tongue. “Thank you.”

“Yamaguchi,” another heavy pause, and Tsukishima’s face flashed through Tadashi’s mind, his mouth open to speak, before it vanished. “I have time tomorrow night.”

⋆｡°✩

Ukai lived in a cozy development nestled in the suburban hills of Sendai. Tsukishima met Tadashi just outside the neighborhood, and they began to ascend towards Ukai’s house together in silence.

“I know you’re probably not ready to talk to me, but I just have to say—Thank you,” Tadashi started, and the look Tsukishima gave him was layered with meaning, in a language Tadashi couldn’t yet understand.

“I was surprised,” Tsukishima responded eventually, as the hill started to take away the evenness of Tadashi’s breath. “When you called. _That_ you called. I thought you had already said everything you needed to say.”

Tadashi bit his lip. “What I said was—”

“I never say things the right way,” Tsukishima continued, and Tadashi looked over at him with a start. “I’m good in a courtroom, or good enough at least. But when it comes to stuff like—” He met Tadashi’s eyes, then looked away. “I never meant to offend you. I apologize.”

Tadashi didn’t realize he had stopped until Tsukishima looked back for him. “Yamaguchi—”

“You were right,” Tadashi said, steadying his breath. “You were right. Speaking your mind, and fighting for what you deserve—I should have done it from the start. I’m so much happier now, and it’s thanks to you.”

He saw Tsukishima’s breath hitch, but then his vision blurred, and he realized in terror that he had started to cry.

“Only, I’m not happy at all,” he continued, scrubbing furiously at the wet trails on his cheeks. “Because I know I lost out on you. But that’s my fault. So, you don’t have anything to apologize for—”

“Yamaguchi,” Tsukishima was suddenly in front of him, and he placed his slender hands around Tadashi’s wrists and held them, reassuringly. “You don’t have anything to apologize for, Yamaguchi. I wanted to say all of this when I saw you in the hospital, but I thought you were still upset with me. I never thought—I didn’t expect a second chance. I didn’t think I deserved one.”

“Oh,” Tadashi’s breath came shakily, and he might have mistaken it for a laugh, if this situation was at all comical. “I thought it was me. I didn’t realize how freeing it is to just say what’s on your mind, but I didn’t think you were ready to hear it.”

“Sometimes it’s more trouble than it’s worth,” Tsukishima said, and Tadashi did laugh this time. “But if you’re willing, maybe we could both… try again?”

“I’m pretty willing,” Tadashi said, and then his face went hot with mortification. But Tsukishima’s smile was kind, and beautiful, and Tadashi felt like kissing it.

“Me too,” Tsukishima said. “But I think we should take care of this first.”

“R-Right,” Tadashi realized suddenly they were standing in the middle of a residential road, and the weight of the bag around his shoulder was starting to pull heavily at his sore muscles.

It was time to thank Ukai for all he had done.

⋆｡°✩

The man at the door is a younger version of Ukai, and Tadashi guesses that this is Keishin. When he invites them in, the household is warm with light. Or maybe, Tadashi is warm because Tsukishima’s hand is _so_ close to his, well within reach. Tadashi hasn’t yet figured out if he’s doing it on purpose.

Ukai is glad to see them both, if a little surprised, and Tadashi wonders just how much he picked up on about their relationship. He remembers Ukai’s early comments about volleyball, and about how Tsukishima’s outlook on the lawsuit had helped him pursue it, and how Ukai’s own comments had influenced his opinion of Tsukishima.

Ukai is ecstatic when he opens up the box of savory pies Tadashi had brought him. As Tadashi explains to him his new position at Karasuno, and bows in respect and gratitude for Ukai’s advice throughout the last few weeks, Ukai smiles kindly at him and pats him on the shoulder.

“There’s no need for that at all, son,” he says. “It was in you all along.”

“Yes,” says Tadashi. “But I wouldn’t have been able to find it without help.”

He sees Tsukishima stiffen out of the corner of his eye, and thanks Ukai again.

They don’t stay for long, but exchange a few more conversational topics that reveal that Ukai and the others will soon be seeing a settlement, and Ukai’s own recovery has been speedy enough that he will be back to coaching a local youth volleyball team within the month.

“We’re always looking for mentors,” he says, his voice full of hope, and Tadashi meets Tsukishima’s eyes with a smile.

“You seemed surprised,” Tadashi said as they walked back down the long hill, having passed on Ukai’s dinner invitation. “When I mentioned the changes at Karasuno.”

“Honestly, I don’t often see good results unless it’s on the other end of a lawsuit,” Tsukishima admits.

“I think that’s okay, though,” Tadashi says, cheeks growing red. “I didn’t understand it at first, but you really do fight to try to help people, like Ukai.”

Tsukishima is silent for a while, and Tadashi worries he’s offended him again. But then, he speaks, and his voice soft. “When I saw you in the hospital, I wanted to fight for you.”

Tadashi pauses, and turns to Tsukishima, and sees that his smile is a little restless, a little unsure. Before his smile has time to drop, Tadashi grins back at him, feeling bright in the twilight, confidence making its new home in his chest.

Tsukishima is still smiling when Tadashi takes his hand, and Tadashi is still smiling when Tsukishima leans down for a kiss.

⋆｡°✩ Epilogue ⋆｡°✩

Tadashi is resolutely focused on straightening his tie in the mirror, so he doesn’t notice Kei until the other man has hooked his chin over his shoulder.

“Tell me again why I have to go?”

“Because,” Tadashi heaved a dramatic sigh with no real meaning behind it. “You are supporting your dear partner in an upcoming venture that is taking a lot of courage on his part.”

“I already went to Karasuno’s soft launch for their second location last week. And you already know you'll be great as their new head of pastry.”

Tadashi smirked. He liked the sound of his new title, and he was beginning to suspect Kei did too. “I wasn’t talking about me, and you know it. Kageyama and Hinata are just starting to get to know each other, and since I was the one who introduced them, it would be kind of us to both go on this double date to ease things along.”

Kei’s face did something horrible, and Tadashi wondered at how he was now able to read this man like an open book. He was surprised there had ever been any doubt in his mind—Kei telegraphed every emotion in the curve of his eyebrow, the pull of his lips. All it took was some time to become fluent.

“Don’t think about it that way,” Tadashi snickered.

“I _really_ don’t want to think about it at all,” Kei said.

“Sorry, Tsukki,” he said, angling his face and letting his mouth soften.

“No, you’re not,” Kei responded, leaning closer. His eyes fluttered closed, his eyelashes bright and golden.

“No, I’m not,” Tadashi said, and their lips met.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for going on this journey with me and for all of your comments! please continue to let me know what you thought!


End file.
